Sounding better to a country bass
Sounding like my heart.
You never allowed me growing pains
Just tore out my heart. My feelings weren’t important
And you took them apart
Left me reaching out for you. Punishing me.
For growing pains.
Too brief. Too unknown. Unexplored.
And I left … but floored. Unable to explain
This growing pain.
Do you know what you did?
How your shallow heart skimmed across the lake of my life.
Didn’t touch me. Just took me. Wrung me out.
Turned me like a page when you didn’t even know the book.
I am a gentle lover I said. So intricate in desire
So conscious of failing myself … and you.
And your lonely mind wrote me off.
To grab your next provider.
Don’t know who I feel more pity for. You or him?
Don’t know why I feel pity at all.
I shouldn’t at such paucity of spirit
At my growing pains.
And yet I gain strength from those days.
Those disappointments at your lack of spirit
Your crushing of mine….in hopelessness..in pain.
Growing pain that I felt. Dying pain that I feel now
And how. But dying isn’t me. I rise. I sing. I write
It is what I do. And I write with feeling still
My growing pains are that. The pain of growth
And I never give in. I never forget. I never fail
I forgive. I pity. And mostly…